Not All Sobriety Stories Start With A ‘Rock-Bottom’

 

My journey to becoming a ‘Grey Area’ Drinker… and how I found freedom!

 

As a Grey Area Drinking Sobriety Coach for women, I've realised that I need to come out of my introverted shell and share some musings and insights of what the past four+ years have taught me about finding sobriety and my journey to wellness. I'm hoping it may help or inspire even one person who has started to question their relationship with alcohol, and "Sober October" seemed like a good time to start!

Each month I will share information to support those seeking to learn more about the positive benefits of sobriety intertwined with a touch of spirituality. Because it's all connected, as we are energetic souls having a human experience. To begin with, I thought I'd share a bit of my personal story and the fact that I never had a 'rock-bottom.' I've never had a DUI, crashed my car, landed myself in jail or experienced any other major atrocity apart from a few bruises from stumbling out of a bar or falling over on Melbourne Cup Day. The most I experienced from 'enjoying myself' too much were the days and brain cells lost due to hangovers.

I was (what is now termed) a “Grey Area Drinker”

Lady - Grey area drinking

How my drinking career began...

My friendship with alcohol started way back as a teenager when I was about 13 years old. My older brother introduced me to tequila and orange juice one Saturday while he was hanging out with his mates. I naturally just wanted to join in and be part of the 'older, cool gang'. Looking back now, I recognise they were the early signs of wanting to fit in and be liked and not having an "off switch".

I remember the buzz drinking alcohol gave me, the warm glow, and an instant melting into calm. Then the giggles set in, and later I vomited before passing out on the toilet floor! For some people  this would have triggered a future response of 'No way, I'm never doing that again!' It would have also set up a neural pathway to avoid alcohol or at least be wary. But for me, the neural pathway triggered was the initial buzz and what I now know to be the dopamine hit, that instant pleasure that trains our brain to seek more of what felt good.

My teenage years continued with weekend high school binge drinking. Then in 1980, at 19 years old, I left home to join the Navy. Moving away from my home, family, and friends to live interstate in a military environment was undoubtedly a whole new daunting experience! Being such a boozy culture, it suited me as alcohol gave me the courage and confidence to meet new people and, once again, fit in with the new crowd. Hence the pattern of weekend binge drinking continued.

Alcohol became a way of life for me. Unfortunately, like so many, I fell into the trap of believing what society dictates to us, mostly through powerful marketing that continues to invest huge spending into targeting women and normalising alcohol. Marketing that trained us to believe that to have a good time, socialise, commiserate, or relax - we need alcohol.

friends drinking alcohol

I could never imagine going out to dinner, a party, a girls' get-together, Christmas, or any event if I couldn't have wine!

Really, who does that?

So, I stayed in this pattern for the next 40+ years, apart from two pregnancies, without any inkling of its subtle and detrimental effects on my health. However, by now, it was no longer just weekend drinking. It had crept up to a daily habit. That's what alcohol does. Just like other drugs such as cocaine, heroin, methamphetamines, tobacco, and a host of others, alcohol is addictive and a toxin to our body.

The only difference is that it's legal.

Fast forward to July 2018. I had health issues, was obesely overweight, anxious, and depressed (all alcohol-related). It was then that the universe gave me one big sign I couldn't ignore. I suddenly developed an unsightly, red, swollen, itchy rash on my face. Of all places, it was the one part of my body that I couldn't ignore! 

My intuition had been trying to tell me for years that I needed to stop my daily wine habit. But I just didn't know how. And more so, where could I seek help without feeling judged and shamed? I didn't think I was an alcoholic, but maybe I was. To me, the common perception in society was black and white, that if you have a problem with alcohol, you must be an alcoholic! I felt so alone with my thoughts and like I was the only person in the world with this problem. This fear of speaking up kept me stuck for years!

However, I was fully functioning. I was a wife and mum of two children, ran a busy household, had a job, and volunteered in the community.

So, how could I be an alcoholic?

I wasn't sitting in the park drinking out of a brown paper bag or having "vodka on my cereal" for breakfast!

After continued health issues, I was tested for Lupus, an autoimmune condition, and when I investigated further, what I couldn't ignore was the constant advice to 'avoid alcohol'.

Choices.

We all have them, and mine at that time was to continue drinking or risk death. Simple. Thankfully, it was the wake-up call I needed and led me to begin my quest for better health.

Since that time, my health has improved considerably. By removing my nightly wine habit, I have shed 25kgs, no longer have anxiety, depression or any medical issues and have gained so much more in positive physical and emotional benefits. I now exercise regularly, prioritise my sleep, eat a mostly plant-based diet, and meditate. I've also learned to be kinder to myself and practice regular self-care, which includes having boundaries - and of course, bubble baths and the occasional pedicure!

bubble bath for self-care

The most profound shift, however, has been my mindset. Learning how to ditch the booze without feeling deprived or like I'm missing out has been the key to my sustainable sobriety and finally finding freedom from the wine witch.

During a meditation whilst in a Covid lockdown in 2020, I realised I needed to change direction and use my experience to help other women in my community who were like me. Women feeling stuck in the alcohol trap.

In the past two years, I have retrained as a Life Coach and specialised as a GAD Sobriety Coach, which has opened so many new opportunities. It's enabled me to meet and learn from, albeit virtually, some amazing and inspiring women.

My journey has included training in other complementary modalities such as Reiki, Theta Healing, NLP (Neurolinguistic Programming), and Conscious Hypnosis. I'm currently completing my certification in clinical EFT (Emotional Freedom Techniques) using somatic-based practices for nervous system regulation.

To further enhance the experience in my Sobriety Coaching business, I have now introduced Wellness Retreats. These retreats bring like-minded women together in a safe, non-judgmental, relaxing space for connection, self-care and to nourish the soul.

All this certainly wouldn't have been possible if I were still consuming my nightly bottle of wine!

So don't think you need to have a 'rock-bottom' to change your relationship with alcohol.

Anytime is a good time to start taking better care of your health to live a better life.

If you would like to learn more about how you could find your freedom and achieve success like many of my coaching clients, check out my Coaching Services.

As an introductory special, I'm delighted to offer you a 10% discount on any coaching package until 30 November 2022.

You can book your FREE Discovery Call here.

I look forward to helping you find your freedom and live a life you love - without alcohol.

Namaste,

Cindy

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